muskrat_john ([info]muskrat_john) wrote,
@ 2008-08-10 14:08:00
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Current location:Muskrat Central
Current mood: busy
Current music:Madison Mallards on the radio
Entry tags:favvre, history, jokes

A priest, a rabbi and a quarterback...
A friend just sent a joke along:

Payton Manning, Tomy Romo and Brett Favre all stand before God, in heaven. God asks Peyton Manning first: 'What do you believe?'

Peyton thinks long and hard, looks God in the eye, and says, 'I believe in hard work, and in staying true to family and friends. I believe in giving. I was lucky, but I always tried to do right by my fans.'

God can't help but see the essential goodness of Manning, and offers him a seat to his left.

Then God turns to Tony Romo and says, 'What do you believe?'

Tony says, 'I believe passion, discipline, courage and honor are the fundamentals of life. I, too, have been lucky, but win or lose, I've always tried to be a true sportsman, both on and off the playing fields.'

God is greatly moved by Tony's sincere eloquence, and he offers him a seat to his right.

Finally, God turns to Brett Favre: 'And you, Brett, what do you believe?'

Brett replies, 'I believe you're in my seat.'


The main reason I post it here is, I first heard this more than 30 years ago, in the mid-70s, but with English First Division Football coaches in the place of the American quarterbacks. I forget who specifically had Brett Favre's position in the joke, but I can't help wondering, when I first heard this joke in 1975, how old it was even then.

Other than that, it's virtually word-for-word.

This world never ceases to amaze me.




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[info]whumpdotcom
2008-08-10 07:24 pm UTC (link)
And that reminds me of the punchline of a joke I heard while I was growing up in Dallas: "Oh that's just God, he only thinks he's Tom Landry."

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[info]clanwilliam
2008-08-10 10:06 pm UTC (link)
In Ireland, it was "oh, that's God, he only thinks he's Bono"...

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[info]taschoene
2008-08-12 03:13 am UTC (link)
In the Navy, it's "Oh, that's God, he only wishes he was a SEAL."

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[info]flawed_karma
2008-08-10 07:28 pm UTC (link)
I remember that joke from when I was in second grade. Father Steve had a great time telling us in Communion prep class.

But Favre..yeah. I'm in NJ and all everyone is talking about is him. I feel so bad for Pennington. He was a decent QB, just the rest of the team sucked too. And he could only work with what he had..

Favre might help. At least the team is excited to play this year. But if Brett screws up, Gang Green will turn on him and make him wish he stayed retired.

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[info]smoemeth
2008-08-10 07:42 pm UTC (link)
Brilliant. I just emailed that to my friend who is a lifelong Packers fan ... I'm sure he'll get a kick out of it. :)

(I want to hire a skywriter to fly over Manhattan with the message "DO THE WORDS 'JOE MONTANA IN KANSAS CITY' MEAN NOTHING TO YOU PEOPLE?!")

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[info]gmskarka
2008-08-10 10:30 pm UTC (link)
Well, to be fair, Montana got them to the AFC championship in '94.....

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[info]jester_uk
2008-08-10 07:52 pm UTC (link)
I wouldn't be at all surprised if it was Brian Clough

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[info]muskrat_john
2008-08-10 08:25 pm UTC (link)
I believe it may well have been...

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[info]algy
2008-08-10 10:11 pm UTC (link)
What's that Cloughie quote? "I'm not saying that I'm the best manager, but I would have to say that I'm in the Top 1."

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[info]eldar
2008-08-10 09:43 pm UTC (link)
I was about to say that. The other two were probably Don Revie and Ron Greenwood.

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[info]clanwilliam
2008-08-10 10:07 pm UTC (link)
Brian Clough was my number one guess too.

Nowadays, of course, it'd be Alex Ferguson.

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[info]catherinew
2008-08-10 09:59 pm UTC (link)
My dad heard this same joke with three politicians, the third of whom was Hillary Clinton.

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[info]repton_infinity
2008-08-10 10:55 pm UTC (link)
Have you heard this joke before? –
A man is at a fair when he sees a fortune-teller's hut. Being sceptical about such things, he decides to play a little trick. He goes inside and asks the fortune-teller what his father is up to.

"Your father is fishing in Ontario."

"Hah!" says the man. "My father has been dead for ten years!"

"Your mother's husband has been dead for ten years. Your father just caught a fine trout."
Turns out it's at least sixteen hundred years old.

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[info]talinthas
2008-08-11 01:47 am UTC (link)
hey john, are you going to be reposting everything in your journal to your syndication feed? Cause if so, i just want to keep one on my friends list to avoid duplication.

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[info]muskrat_john
2008-08-11 04:12 pm UTC (link)
No. In practice, very few things should go on the syndication feed (which grabs EVERYTHING from the DorkTower.com website).

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[info]captain_jester
2008-08-11 02:45 am UTC (link)
I always heard the joke with Chuck Norris in the role of Brett Favre...

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[info]hexar_le_saipe
2008-08-11 06:14 am UTC (link)
That's kind of like the "Jesus and Moses golfing" joke that I heard a couple of years ago. The last time I heard it the punch line was, "No, he thinks he's Tiger Woods," the first time I heard it in high school the punch line was, "No, he thinks he's Jack Nicklaus."

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[info]tallarn
2008-08-11 09:22 am UTC (link)
I heard the same joke featuring Dubya. :)

Here's another very old joke for you:

A family is travelling through the USA when they see a sign for a Native American reservation. They are interested so they decide to head inside. Once there, they see a tent with a sign "Amazing Memory Man". The teenage son is enthralled, and demands to go in.

Inside, it's dark and slightly spooky. An Native American man sits cross legged, silently. A sign above his head says "Ask one question!"

The teenage son is very impressed, and asks "Who won the FA Cup in 1982?" The Memory Man thinks for a moment, and says "Tottenham Hotspur."

Fifteen years later, the teenage son, now married, is travelling through America again with his wife and their young son. He spots the sign for the reservation, and excitedly tells his family that he stopped here years ago and would love to revisit. They go in.

Amazingly, the tent is still there, still with the same sign. The man rushes in, to see the what is clearly the same man still sat cross-legged. Overcome by emotion, and with deep respect, he raises his hand, palm forwards and says "How."

The Memory Man looks up at him, ponders for a moment, and says "Ricky Villa with an excellent solo goal."

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[info]vorhellia
2008-08-11 01:39 pm UTC (link)
ROFLMAO awesomesauces ^.^

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[info]muskrat_john
2008-08-11 04:13 pm UTC (link)
I remember this from when I was a kid, too...

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[info]mister_wolf
2008-08-11 01:22 pm UTC (link)
I have no idea who any of those people are (except God, I guess), but it is still funny.

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[info]hackard
2008-08-11 01:45 pm UTC (link)
That's OK. Brett loves you anyway.

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[info]muskrat_john
2008-08-11 01:57 pm UTC (link)
Hee!

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